Thig’s Pen Fifteen Sketchbook

Ever Wonder Why Thig’s Sketchbook Gets Likes While Yours Gets Lost in the Algorithm Abyss?

🚨 ART FAILURE ALERT: WHY YOUR SKETCHBOOK IS A DISGRACE 🚨

Are you tired of posting your sketchbook online, only to get zero likes while some Beefy Chad Artist like Thig gets dozens (sometimes fives!) of likes? Well, it’s not your fault. Your art just isn’t Alpha enough.

Want more satire? Check out my Influencer Awards.

Golden Globe “Influencer” Awards

Thig

Jan 15

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If you don’t subscribe to my elite alpha newsletter, THEN DO U EVEN DRAW?Subscribed

Look at this cat, LOOK AT THIS CAT! This cat thinks your sketchbooks are WEAK AS AF!

But don’t worry—I got you, (my only) fan.

BECOME A STUD-Y IN ARTISTIC DOMINANCE

With my ULTIMATE SKETCHBOOK EXCLUSIVE SKETCHBOOK CLUB, you will go from a weak, beta pencil-pusher to an ARTISTIC MONSTER, so aggressively talented that girls will fling their nether-pants at you, screaming:

“Omg, you’re such a studly artist… TAKE ME, I’M YOURS!”

Look at this sketch I did! THIS SKETCH MAKES YOU LOVE AMERICA! IT IS THE BEST SKETCH. EVERYONE IS TALKING ABOUT. IT.

But how, you ask? Simple. Follow my guide to MAXIMUM ARTISTIC DOMINANCE.

🔥 The Secret to Art Mastery: The PEN FIFTEEN Club 🔥

(100% Totally Real and Not an Ironic Grift)

WHEN WOMEN SEE MY SKETCHES THEY INSTANTLY BECOME SHIRTLESS!

Want IN on the secret art society that makes all pro artists legendary?
Introducing: The PEN FIFTEEN Club, PEN15 For Short.
(The Most EXCLUSIVE club for ART CHADS.)

Joining the PEN15 Club will GROW YOUR ARTISTIC STAMINA by 5490% and make your sketches SO HARD, people will assume they were carved into marble by Michelangelo’s jacked reincarnation. That’s REAL SCIENCE, baby!

How Do You Join???

You Join by SUBSCRIBING IN PENCIL! NO ERASERS ALLOWED!Subscribed

Just take one daily dose of our scientifically untested, completely unregulated, sketchbook-enhancing vitamin supplement:

✏️ PEN15 MAX GROWTH PILLS

Make Your Lines So Hard They Etch Themselves Into Gladiator History
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A PICTURE OF NED AND EDNA! THEY TOOK THE PEN15 CHALLENGE AND BECAME HARDCORE ALPHAS AND ALPHETTES!!

💥 What’s in it?

Compressed charcoal powder – Gives you veiny, vascular pencil strokes.
Ink extract from ancient forbidden scrolls – Makes you immune to bad anatomy.
Vitamin BEEF – Enhances raw artistic aggression and increases sketchbook girth.
OMG DO YOU EVEN SUBSCRIBE!? Do I need put subscribe pops up in this to TEACH YOUR LIMP WRISTED NO SUBSCRIBING SELF TO SUBSCRIBE!”Subscribed
100% Pure Graphite Testosterone Blend – So manly, your lead will sharpen itself.

💥 WARNING: Side effects may include overwhelming sketchbook dominance, spontaneous mustache growth, and an inability to stop talking about composition.

💪 REAL TESTIMONIALS FROM TOTALLY NOT-MADE-UP PEOPLE 💪

SUBSCRIBE TODAY AND GET A FREE BOTTLE OF DUNNING KRUGER WITH YOUR PURCHASE OF $2,503,252.94 (shipping not including. Void in Beta Cuck countries like Canada and Mexico.)Subscribed

(Did I mention this article is satire?)

IF YOUR WORK DOESN’T LOOK LIKE IT’S ON ROIDS THEN UR DOING IT WRONG!

📣 “Before PEN15, my sketches were flaccid and uninspired. Now, they’re so hard, they could break cinder blocks. Thanks, Thig!”
— Beefy Art Chadbot, 37

Be like Beefy Art Chadbot (who is a totally real person) and subscribe!Subscribed

📣 “I followed Thig’s method and now my sketchbook is so heavy I have to lift it like a powerlifter. My biceps are as developed as my cross-hatching skills.”
— Some Guy on Instagram With Too Many Neck Veins

Larry couldn’t get babes until he subscribed to Thig’s PEN15 club! Now he’s an ALPHA CHAD, OWNING LIBS ON r/Art!Subscribed

📣 “Leonardo da Vinci’s ghost appeared to me in a dream and personally approved of this method.”
— Anonymous Sketch Chadbot, Possibly Michelangelo’s Reincarnation… or a bot.

💪 The ULTIMATE CHAD ARTIST CHECKLIST:

You do not need any other list than the one below. But you should subscribe first!Subscribed

DO LINE PRACTICES 25 HOURS A DAY TO GET THE HOTTEST TRAD WIFE BABES WHO TOTALLY DON’T HAVE A HIGH BODY COUNT. (Unless you’re my wife and by body count, I mean the people before me who have crossed her and ended up in the basement, very still and covered in lime to mask the smell.)

Do You Have What It Takes to Be a Sketchbook Titan?

ARTISTS HATE THIS ONE TRICK: SUBSCRIBE AND FIND OUT THE SECRETSubscribed

Doubtful! But follow these guaranteed tips and (maybe some) babes without underwear will be powerless when they see your work!

1️⃣ Get a Pencil – But not just any pencil. You need one with ROCK-HARD LEAD, because you’re about to sketch with the force of a thousand Greek sculptures.

2️⃣ Get a Sketchbook – But make sure it’s expensive and hardbound, preferably made from endangered rainforest trees and bound in artisan male yak-leather. Anything else is for artistic weaklings.

3️⃣ Post Your Sketches Online and DEMAND Engagement – If someone doesn’t immediately validate your art, delete it in shame (and go cry in your corner you beta cuck)

4️⃣ GO HARD.

(also subscribe)Subscribed

🚫 MISTAKES ONLY ART BETA CUCKS MAKE 🚫

(Is your name “Marc Cuckaberg!?” NO! You are an ART Apex Predator Sketch Gladiator

LOOK AT ALL THE BETA CUCKS IN THIS SKETCH! THEY ONLY EAT STEAK FROM FEMALE COWS, NOT FROM HARD CORE BULLS LIKE REAL CHAD ARTISTS EAT! AND THEY WEAR A RED HAT. EVERYONE KNOWS RED HATS ARE FOR BETA CUCK SHITBAGS THAT HAVE VOTED IN AN ORANGE BETA CUCK WHO JUGGLES PUTIN’S BALLS IN HIS MOUTH. THANKS FOR RUINING AMERICA YOU FUCKING ASSHOLES. But hey…eggs tho…egg prices gonna come down soon.

ONLY FOLLOW THESE STEPS NOW, NOT THE STEPS ABOVE, THOSE STEPS ARE NOW ONLY FOR BETAS WHO SURF REDDIT.

❌ Using Cheap Sketchbooks – If your sketchbook costs less than a down payment on a house, you’re doing it wrong. Also not subscribing, so subscribe.Subscribed

❌ Sketching for Fun – What is this, a hobby?! Your sketchbook is for HARDCORE FINISHED MASTERPIECES ONLY.Subscribed

❌ Taking Breaks – Rest days are for cowards… and watercolor artists. Draw 80 hours a week or get out of the PEN15 Club.Subscribed

❌ Using Cheap Pens – If your quill isn’t handcrafted by a blind Russian artisan monk, throw it out.Subscribed

❌ Experimenting with New Styles – NO! Draw the SAME THING, FOREVER, until you master it at a Malcolm Gladwell-approved 10,000-hour grind.Subscribed

(Side Note: Malcolm Gladwell is a fraud and also a beta cuck. 10,000 hours? Pshaw. More like infinity hours if you wanna be a REAL ART CHAD.)Subscribed

NEVERMIND!!! TOO MUCH RED BULL… Forget the other, other steps, follow these steps now:

💎 PRO ARTIST SECRETS: HOW TO BE A PEN15 MASTER

(Follow These and Ascend to Sketchbook Greatness)

A sketch of Bey-Z. A MANLY sketch of Bey-Z. Stay tuned for next week when I draw ALPHA JUDY GARLAND!

📜 Rule #1: Your Sketchbook Is A Masterpiece OR IT’S GARBAGE.
If you make one bad drawing, set it on fire and start over. No weak sketches allowed.

📹 Rule #2: Film Yourself Sketching 24/7
If there isn’t video proof of you drawing, did you even draw? No. No, you didn’t.

USE SECRET PASSWORD PEN15 TO GET A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF DUNNING KRUEGERSubscribed

📢 Rule #3: If Your Post Gets No Likes, Scream About Censorship
Write an open letter to Mark Cuckaberg, telling him you’ve been canceled by the woke agenda because your hentia masterpiece anime OC didn’t get engagement.

💰 Rule #4: BUY MORE SKETCHBOOKS
If you mess up a page, THROW YOUR WHOLE SKETCHBOOK AWAY and start fresh. Sketchbooks are disposable and must always be perfect.Subscribed

💀 Rule #5: DRAW UNTIL YOU DIE
“Off days” are for losers. You don’t need rest, inspiration, or sleep. You only need to sketch harder.

🏃 Rule #6: If You Mess Up A Drawing, Do 50 Burpees
Punish your weak artistic hands for failing you.

🖼 Rule #7: MEME YOUR SKETCHES
Add deep, cryptic captions that appropriate BiPOC/LGBTQAi+ culture like:

“Sometimes it be like that.”
“Very demure, very mindful.”
“Yaaaassss.”
“Subscribe, yolo”Subscribed

RULE#8: GET A MIDJORNEY AI ACCOUNT, WRITE A SENTENCE TO MAKE A SKETCH, PRINT IT OUT AND TAPE IT IN YOUR SKETCHBOOK.

🔥 FINAL WARNING: DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BE A PEN15 MASTER?

If you’re ready to TAKE YOUR ART TO THE NEXT LEVEL, follow these steps. Otherwise, go back to doodling flowers like a watercolor beta cuck.

Still not convinced? Here’s my masterpiece sketchbook for reference:

LOOK AT THIS PERFECT SKETCHBOOK ENTRY. IT WOULD BE HANGING IN THE MOMA IF IT WASN’T RUN BY A BUNCH OF BETA ART LIBS!

💀 That’s right. If you don’t draw like this, you’re doing it wrong.

🔥 DO YOU ACCEPT YOUR PEN15 DESTINY? 🔥

YES? THEN GO SKETCH, YOU CHAD ART WARRIOR.

💥 BONUS OFFER: Buy now and get a FREE 10-HOUR RANT about why ART SCHOOL IS A SCAM. That’s right, ONLY I know all the answers, NOT some accredited art school!

(And don’t forget to buy my totally real and not-at-all-fake PEN15 MAX GROWTH PILLS for MAXIMUM ARTISTIC STRENGTH.)

EVEN “MOAR” OF MY NOT-BETA GLADIATOR ART

My sketchbook is my sanctuary, it’s not meant to be slick, perfect or impress anyone. It’s more me getting ideas down, quickly drawing what’s in my head and enjoying the sounds a pencil or a pen(15) make when it goes across the paper.

My sketchbook is for one thing, and one thing only and that’s for having fun.

If you made it this far and missed the part where I emphasized that this article is satire? Well… It’s satire.