Dear Parents of the “artist” known as Thig,
Your child’s drawing of a cat was submitted for review. To call it unsuccessful would be generous. At one point in my career, I witnessed an AI produce a horse with six legs and a face like melting clay. And yet, I assure you, not even that was this bad.
The form collapses immediately. The legs are four limp appendages without weight or articulation. The torso is a formless swell that communicates nothing but apathy. The eyes hover, misplaced, detached from any cranial structure. The silhouette is not a cat — it is simply an error, stretched across paper.
In professional critique, we would end the meeting here. A director would close the portfolio, thank the candidate for their time, and quietly recommend another career path. The sad truth is, your child has drawn the kind of work that machines refuse to claim.
Respectfully,
Mrs. Pickens, 3rd Grade Art Teacher.
