When you stare at the new CRACKER BARREL LOGO you start liking GAVIN NEWSOM. that ain’t just gay that’s CALIFORNIA gay. pray for this nation.

If I wanted to wade through a swamp every time I stepped outside, I’d move to Florida. This humidity is NOT “natural,” and I don’t care what the weather man (who is secretly the devil, I nseen it in the utube—someone’s tampering with the sky and it sure aint jesus

my grandbaby touched the new Cracklin Barrel menu and now her hands smell like WOKE. ivermectin did not remove it. plz advise.

Why is "The Law" telling us not to eat shrimp in ANY MONTH with a LETTER. Guess what honey every month has a letter. who votes these people in their so dum??

Some man in tight pants at the buffet called me a PRAWN STAR. THIS IS SEXUAL HARRASSMENT. management would not refund my hush puppies.

there is a NEW BIRD in my side yard and it is NOT of the Lord. it squawked three times at 6:66am and which is the sound of the beasts…I went 2 the PigglyWiggle and bought some ezekial bread, then I threw a handful of that Ezekiel bread at it but it didn’t flee. just stared…like a demon would. I rebuke itand ORDER U TO LEAVE WHN U? SEE THIS, BIRD…. I also have an unspoken prayer request bout the state of chickfila lemonade

the new smart speed-bump just emailed me a $20 over-walking ticket for strolling past at 4 mph. i wasn’t even in my car, so that’s entrapmint and phishing. city hall calls it a “pilot program,” which we all know means drone-surveilence. “liberty sleeps when asphalt spies,” — thomas jefferson (beta).

Back in my day we got 1 dumdum sucker and a pencil from the dentist and we were THANKFUL. Now kids expect KitKats the size of a Bible and their parents venmo tips. What’s next, health insurance for fun size Snickers?

SO SICK of yall turning HALLOWeen into a Las Vegas satan festival. I counted SIXTEEN inflatables on one yard—there’s a dragon, 2 skeletons bigger than my trailer, and one spider that TRIGGERED my PTSD from when I went to the Rainforest Café in 1997.

HALLOWeen is a high holy day for WICCANS and LIBERALS. Candy corn is a gateway to SATAN. Ezekiel 23:20 warns of donkeys, and guess what, that’s the Democrat mascot. WAKE UP SHEEPLE.